Five months and waiting...

Hello out there...
Here we are, 5 months into our wait.  <sigh>.  Seems as if my dreams and my intutition were slightly off.  I was pretty convinced (or just wishfully thinking) that our baby would find us in April, or around the 4 month mark.  But, nope.  Not yet.  What we keep hearing is that when the time comes, and we've got our child in our arms, that it's all going to make sense. The road we've had to travel to become parents will make sense and it'll all be worth it.  Intellectually, I'm sure that's true.  Emotionally, it's hard to hear and harder to swallow.  Time will tell.  I'm sure I'll be reporting that it's all coming together.  I will be saying that I understand now why things happened as they did, etc.  But sometimes it just feels like crap.
We just went to our last seminar.  Open Arms does such a great job of educating us on all aspects of the process.  We recently went to one on The Developmental Understanding of Adoption, and then one on Genetic Vulnerabilities.  We have been to each and every seminar that they've offered, and we've been through their entire repetoire.  It feels good to have gotten through them all, and at the same time, it stinks to know we've been around long enough to get through them all.  I'm already missing the consistent contact that the seminars allow us to have with Open Arms.  Feels like someone's holding our hands when we know we can count on seeing them once month.  I feel sort of out there and alone now, like we're growing up and someone thinks we don't need them as much, when in fact we'll likely feel like we need them more.  They've always told us that we're never alone in this, that they're never more than a phone call away, to let them know what we need and how they can support us best.  Have I ever mentioned how much I LOVE Open Arms Adoption Network?  Have I told you how fantastic they are and how caring they are?  We are so fortunate that we found them and chose them.  They certainly have never treated us like just another family trying to adopt a baby.  They have this amazing way of making us feel like we're the ONLY family trying to adopt a baby and that they are here for us and us alone.  Of course that's not true, but they certainly treat us this way and it means so much to me!
Hey, have I told you lately that I'm tired of waiting?  We are ready for this, so if any of you have connections out there and can make the wait come to an end, this would be a really good time to use those connections!  Feel free...